Source: Relevant Magazine – Craig Groeschel
Craig Groeschel on why boundaries aren’t a bad thing.
Think about your relatives for a moment. Who is the difficult one in your family? Yes, every family has one, a psycho, tough-to-deal-with sort of deranged person who makes life challenging for everyone around them. They may be angry or silly, defensive or detached, petty or delusional, shrill or sullen, whiny or saccharine, bitter or baffling, critical or indulgent—or all of the above!
Based on my experiences and observations, I see three common types of toxic people. They can be found in most any family, office, church or neighborhood.
The chronic critics. These are the people who can find fault in everything — and I do mean everything. The chronically negative person wears on you, dragging you down day by negative day. Their criticism is never constructive. Their judgmental spirit clogs your heart. Their gossip infects your opinion of others. Some have the spiritual gift of encouragement; these people have the unholy gift of complaining.
The controller. Controllers are overbearing, forcing their way and opinions upon you regardless of your will. It might seem small and insignificant at first — going to their favorite restaurant or movie. Before long they are choosing your college, your girlfriend, and your future career. If you’re married to a controller, you might feel like you are losing your personal identity. You’re barely able to make even the simplest decisions for yourself, always surrendering to avoid a fight. Your spouse knows how to manipulate, wielding fear and guilt as weapons that threaten your soul. Controllers may have good intentions, but their darts are poisonous.
The tempter. This type encourages you to do things that you know you shouldn’t and may not normally even want to do. It might be your boyfriend who pushes you to do things sexually, although you’ve made it clear that you’d rather save that for marriage. Or it might be your buddy who smokes two packs a day and lures you back into the old destructive lifestyle you fought so valiantly to leave behind. It could be your rich friend who lives for material things. Though you know there is more to life than possessions, each time you’re close to your blingy-friend, you crave what she has.
Finish: When You Should End A Friendship